Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

The Law of Attraction is a powerful universal law which draws to us whatever is our most dominant vibration at any given moment in time. 

Sometimes I feel like I am living the law of attraction. In the past half year, I have drawn to me some very powerful mentors and a multi-dimensional support team who have helped me to actualize many of my life goals.

It is uncanny how whenever I am with a new breastfeeding family there is a palpable shift of the energy in the room.  Often the mothers will tease me and say that their baby is always on his/her best behavior when I am around.  It does seem that way.  I attribute this to my implacable confidence and optimism which embodies this universal law of attraction. It sets the tone for positive changes in each unique breastfeeding relationship. In fact, it came up recently where I had to caution a baby “nurse” to refrain from her negative speak as it was not helping the mother to focus her attention toward a successful breastfeeding connection. 

Change does not come without some discomfort.  If we expect a bad outcome that is usually what we will get.  I expect good outcomes and am rarely disappointed when that expectation is mixed with making incremental improvements in the mother’s skill set in connecting with her baby.

The Law of Attraction can and should be used by you especially during this important life passage as a new breastfeeding mother.

.

It was a hot day like today when I was last at the famous Zen Rock Garden of the Ryoan-ji Temple  in Kyoto, Japan.   It was a very still and peaceful place, save for the other tourist moving about and inserting herself into my photo.

I sat at the edge and contemplated my breath while gazing  at the gently raked rock garden gleaming brightly in the heat of the day.

I am often reminded of this feeling when I am in the presence of a Conscious Breastfeeding mother and baby.  There is a stillness that descends upon the nursing couple.  A rhythmic sound of breathing and soft swallowing comes from the baby while it is feeding.  The mom looks serene and comfortable as she is very much in the moment.

In this fast paced world in which we live, each breastfeeding session offers an opportunity to become centered and quiet.  A mother can connect deeply with her baby, both literally and figuratively.  She is sharing her physical and emotional space, as well as her milk, with him or her during this time.

The sales pitch for breastfeeding is that it can be done on the go- anytime, anywhere.  Although this may be true, I strongly encourage moms to explore the benefits of  a more zen experience.

A Conscious Breastfeeding mom creates a sacred space in her home where she is able to focus fully on breastfeeding her baby.  Ideally she will be using a high-backed chair.   Seated with both shoulders resting against the chair, she will draw her baby deeply onto her breast for a pain-free latch.  A secondary benefit of  her good  posture is that she will be facilitatating a sense of comfort and calm in both herself and her baby.  Feedings done this way become a form of zazen, or sitting meditation.

In Zen Begin, Live Your Life the Zen Way, this Zen-Meditation is explained…

Zen is all about focus. Meditation or zazen is an exercise in creating a one- pointedness of mind. The comparison with muddy water is often made. In calm water the mud sinks to the bottom and the water becomes clear.

A Conscious Breastfeeding mom puts her baby to her breast in an intentional manner; she maintains a calm pose and deep rhythmic breathing throughout each feeding session.   As a result, she and her baby come away feeling rested and fortified.  The baby will be in quiet alert and receptive to socialization and interaction with her and other family members; mom’s mind will be more clear and focused.

This mother and child statue was at the edge of a hot spring in the Japanese Alps.   May she inspire you to embrace the the Zen of Conscious Breastfeeding.

What has been your experience of this special breastfeeding time with your baby?

One of the items I recommend to moms for their Conscious Breastfeeding tool-box is a journal. 

I am one of the Kodak generation.  In large families, the  number of photos taken of you were often a function  of where you fell in the line of children.  The moments of our babyhood were not nearly as well catalogued as those of modern babies. Thanks to the digital revolution, the potential exists that every detail of their lives will be captured in vivid detail.

A hard-copy memoir of your time as a breastfeeding mother should be part of the time capsule of your baby’s life.  It will give them insight and understanding into your life as a mother, wife, partner,worker and of their development as a unique individual.

It is remarkably revealing to read my mother’s letters written, in her own hand, to my father before they were married.  Those were the days when people really wrote letters.  Separated by an ocean and without the luxury of cheap phone calls, those missives were their only means of communication.  There, in my mother’s handwriting, I am able to read of how much she was looking forward to having her first baby.  She hoped it would be a girl and was right; I was born the following year.  I wish that the trail didn’t end there.  I would love to know how she felt in those early days as a wife and mother raising me in a new country.

We have all heard of how having a baby seems to alter our ability to remember things.  Your journal will ensure that those precious memories will never fade.

Although it could be kept in a digital form. I recommend that mothers do this the old-fashioned way. 

On the most practical level, you will observe the patterns of your babies life.  You will be looking at feedings and how the breastfeeding is unfolding.  Knowing when and how well feedings are going will give you information to help you optimize your breastfeeding experience.

1. Pick a notebook, album, scrapbook that is beautiful and durable.  You will be filling this with your memories of this time in your life.  It will be a window into how you were growing and feeling as a mother and of the changes you observed in your breastfeeding baby.

2. It might be a great practice to begin writing a note or letter to your baby on a regular basis.  The art of writing can connect us more deeply with our creative, authentic selves.   

3. Take tons of photos of course.  Print some and include them in the pages.  Cut out photos that appeal to you in magazines and periodicals.   You will be creating a sort of vision board for your life as a mother as you document the memories of  breastfeeding your baby .

4. Include inspirational quotes and what you are grateful for on a daily basis.  You will be able to expand upon these ideas as your child grows up.

5. Include calendars and and document important occasions that were experienced during this time.   

6. Include locks of hair, etc. as the mood strikes.  Audio and video (cd/dvd) can be added to supplement the written word. 

Your breastfeeding journal can be so much more than just a way of managing and gaining  insight into your breastfeeding experience.   It can be an opportunity to engage in a creative expression of your life with your baby.  It will capture your  unique handwriting, thoughts and memories for posterity. 

It will serve as a legacy- a time capsule item to share with  future generations of your family. 

Such provenance is priceless!

I had always wanted to go to ‘the Running of the Bulls’ since I first read James Michener’s novel ‘The Drifters’.  I finally made that dream a reality when I went with two of my brothers and my sister-in-law during The World Cup of 1998.

Today is the first day of the feast of St. Fermin, the patron of the festival which runs annually from 7.7-7.14 in Pamplona, Spain.

Pamplona Memories flood back to me.  I vividly remember cheering for Holland with the legions of orange clad fans that followed their matches in the local pubs.  Now, 12 years later, the Dutch have made it into the finals of the World Cup.  Spain plays Germany in the semi-finals on this auspicious Spanish feast day for the other slot.  This 2010 World Cup will be an all Europe final falling within the week of ‘the Running of the Bulls’.

Leather wine flasks, Botas, were being used by many of the festival goers.  My teaching mind saw an immediate and workable analogy between the human breast and those popular items of the festival of St. Fermin.  It occurred to me that the breast also expands and contracts with the volume of milk within it.  Both a wine sack and the breast are never really empty, but will always have some residual left at the bottom once filled with liquid.  To new moms who might be tempted to think of their breasts in terms of being full or empty this new frame of reference makes much better sense and alleviates much unnecessary anxiety.

As you may have noticed in the video above, the assembled crowds all got the memo and were unified in wearing a garb of white and red.  It was difficult to distinguish ourselves among the sea of people dressed the same way.  People were assembled from all over the world.  We were all part of one big family, more alike than different.  A unity that should also apply to breastfeeding.

The notion of solidarity by costume or color is not new.  Pink is for Breast Cancer awareness.  Purple is worn by those who support research for Alzheimers.  The lactation consulting world has made efforts to make Gold be the color of breastfeeding promotion to represent the liquid gold of human milk as the gold standard of infant feeding.

I watched from the sidelines while my brothers joined the ranks of those actually running with the bulls. I may have been a mere observer for those runs, but the same thing cannot be said about my participation in breastfeeding promotion.  I am steadfast in my efforts to inspire, educate, support and empower mothers to revel in the grandeur of their bodies which are so perfectly designed to nurture their babies for 9 months and beyond through the miracle of breastfeeding.

I envision the day, in the not too distant future, when the same fervor I witnessed for the running of the bulls of Pamplona will be expended on being bullish for breastfeeding.

Won’t you join me?  Be part of the change we want to see…Be Bullish for Breastfeeding!

Confidence, according to dictionary.com is a noun.   

1.full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing.  2. belief in oneself and one’s powers or abilities; self-confidence; self-reliance; assurance.

There is a familiar catchphrase.  ‘Fake it until you make it’.   Such attempts at  imitating confidence to produce success often fall short for breastfeeding mothers.   

• They worry about how the experience will be for them, and whether or not they will be successful. 
• There is no margin for error when it comes to feeding and nurturing their babies.

Jerry Stocking was interviewed on the subject of confidence.  If you have time, please check out his blog   where you can read and/or listen to his wonderful perspective on this subject.   He believes that confidence is  more of a process than a thing.  I agree with him, especially when discussing it in relation to breastfeeding. 

The kernels of wisdom from his interview are as follows:

• We want it all without the risk.
• We run into problems when we get caught up in the why’s.
• We should not opt for structure over possibility.
• Confidence and Competence should leap frog for best results.

Conscious breastfeeding is not a no-brainer.   It is a skill that is learned by the mother and taught to her baby.  In reality, there is a process that we must go through to learn any skill.  In his blog post, Learning = Change, Rowan Manahan discusses movement through the steps of lthe learning curve (photo) below. 

1. Unconscious Competence:  A mother acknowledges that breastfeeding is a skill to be learned.  She becomes pro-active in the learning process.  To move to the next level, she may need an intervention to assist her in learning the latch.
2. Conscious Incompetence:  The Aha moment comes when she realizes she must make a decision. Her choice is whether to change a sub-optimal latch, grin and bear the pain or abandon breastfeeding altogether.  This stage of learning can be as short as 3 weeks.  The key is not to give up because of  physical discomfort or mental frustration or exhaustion. 
3. Conscious Competence:  Modifications are learned and made which make the latch consistent and pain-free.
4. Unconscious Competence:  Breastfeeding is operating well without conscious thought.  It is ingrained in the body memory.  The skill has been mastered.

Confidence is a way to play with with the unknown, to learn.  It is present in the first steps of the learning curve as we pay more attention.  With the acquisition of skills, confidence becomes grounded in competence.  Ultimately, it becomes second nature, leaving us with a sense of mastery.  

Confidence can open us up to a much larger game.  The secret is to not become afraid of change.  The balance is struck when we maintain an on-going dance between having faith (confidence) and developing the ability to do something (competence). 

Conscious Breastfeeding mothers put their full attention on optimizing their experience. This is the ultimate confidence game for mothers.